Umwanditsi AURORE umwarimu m’ubumenyi bwo kwigira no kwiteza imbere ( developpement personnel) agaragaza ibikomere 5 bikomeye buri muntu wese ashobora kugira kandi akavuga ko umutima ukomeretse uba umeze nk’icyimuga bigoranye no kugera ku nsinzi y’ubuzima cyangwa kwiteza imbere igihe cyose ukibana n’ibikomere ahubwo ko bisaba kubanza kumenya igikomere ubana nacyo ukabanza ukagikira,ukakikuraho, kugirango ubashe kwigira no kwiteza imbere ugere kucyo waremewe kubacyo ku isi maze ugere ku nsinzi y’ubuzima bwawe
Ibikomere bya Roho cyangwa by’umutima byavumbuwe n’umuganga w’indwara zo mu mutwe w’umunyamerika witwa John Pierrakos, Ubushakashatsi bwe buza gushimangirwa n’umunyakanada Lise Bourbeau wahise ashyira ku mugaragaro igitabo kitwa “Les 5 blessures qui empêchent d’être soi-même”ibikomere bitanu bibuza kuba wowe ubwawe”,agaragaza isano iri hagati y’ibikomere by’imbere ku mutima nuko umuntu agaragara inyuma .
Ibyo bikomere rero byumutima biri muri twe,turabibana tukabikurana byagiye muntekerezo zacu tukiri abana bato kandi ibyinshi twabihawe n’ababyeyi bacu,nabo ubwabo babihawe mu bwana bwabo,Ibi bikomere rero bigira uruhare runini mubuzima bwacu bwa buri munsi,imyitwarire yacu,imibanire yacu na bagenzi bacu,intekerezo zacu ndetse n’amarangamutima yacu.
Nigute ushobora kumenya ibyo bikomere?
Uyu mwanditsi yagaragaje ko byibura buri muntu aba afite ibikomere 3 agendana nabyo,ariko hakaba harimo kimwe kinini kiganza kurusha ibindi,inzira rero yo kukimenya niyo yonyine yagufasha no kugikira,intego rero niyo kwiyambura cyagikomere ubana nacyo kugirango ubashe kuba uwo uri we wanyawe,ariko nanone ubukana bw’igikomere bugiye butandukanye umuntu k’uwundi kuko dushobora guhuza igikomere ariko icyanjye ari kinini kurusha icyawe ndetse n’uburyo cyagiye gitonekwa mu buzima bitandukanye k’umuntu n’undi.
Ibyo bikomere rero byose uko ari 5 nibi bikurikira uko bigenda birutana.
KWANGWA, GUTERERANYWA, GUSUZUGURWA, GUHEMUKIRWA no KURENGANA ( rejet, abandon,humiliation, trahison et injustice) ibinibyo bikomere bikomeye cyane by’umutima umuntu ashobora gukura mu bwana bwe bigatuma aba undi muntu utari we wanyawe.
Uwo mwanditsi avuga ko ibintu byose bidashimishije duhura nabyo mu buzima bwacu bifitanye isano n’ibikomere byacu,muri ibyo bintu twavuga :
1.Ibitubaho mu ntekerezo aribyo:guhangayika,ubwoba,nibindi.
2.Ibijyanye n’amarangamutima yacu aribyo :kwicira urubanza, uburakari bukabije , nibindi .
3.Ibiba k’umibiri yacu aribyo :indwara, gucika intege ,kumva utameze neza, impanuka, nibindi .
Buri gikomere rero kigira icyo yise’’ Masque ‘’ umwambaro wambara w’ubwirinzi uzakoresha wirwanaho mu bihe runaka igihe cyose hari ubyukije igikomere cyawe.Urugero: Tuvuge nk’umuntu ufite igikomere ku kirenge hakagira umuntu umukandagira kuri icyo kirenge, icyo gihe arababara ashobora gutaka ,gutukana,kurakara.kurira,kurwana nibindi , mbese hari imihindagurikire y’amarangamutima ye ibaho kubera umuntu umukandagiye ku kirenge gikomeretse ,n’umutima ukomeretse rero niko umera iyo hagize ikintu gikomaho kibyutsa cya gikomere ; amarangamutima ugira , imyitwarire ugira igendanye nicyo gikomere ufite ntabwo iba igendanye n’ikintu kimubayeho nyirizina kuko uriya muntu iyo baza kumukandagira kukirenge kitariho igikomere ntabwo yari gutaka cyane ngo yitware nkuko yitwaye mugihe bamukandagiye ku gikomere.
Iyo uhuye n’ikintu kikubabaza rero ubabara kubera igikomere ufite ntabwo ubabara kubera ikikubayeho,nihahandi bavuga ngo twese ntabwo tubabazwa nibintu bimwe ngo buriwese afite ibimubabaza byihariye,numara no gusobanukirwa ko buriwese agira igikomere cye uratandukana n’ikintu cyo gucira abandi imanza bitewe nimyitwarire yabo ,bitewe nuko bitwara mubibazo,bitewe n’ibyemezo bafata,kuko byose biba bijyanye n’igikomere umuntu abana nacyo kandi akenshi aba atanakizi bigatuma aba umuntu nawe ubwe adashaka kuba we.uko kuntu witwara; uwo mwambaro wambara,rero iyo ahuye nikikubabaza nibyo Lise Bourbeau yise ‘’Masque’’,iyu mwambaro rero niwo ukubuza kuba wowe wanyawe ntubashe gukora icyo waremewe gukora uri ku isi .
Dore rero uwo mwambaro’’Masque’’ wambara nk’ubwirinzi igihe uhuye nubyutsa icyo gikomere
1.igikomere cyo kwangwa:yambara umwambaro wo guhunga ibimubaho byose akabigendera kure akabigenda hejuru ntabigemo cyane.
2.igikomere cyo gutereranywa: yambara umwambaro wo guhakirizwa kubantu cyane ashaka kubitaho cyane kugirango bamukunde .
3.igikomere cyo guhemukirwa: yambara umwambaro wo kugenzura cyane abantu bose ,uko bavuga ,ibyo bakora ndetse nutuntu duto cyane akadutindaho .
4.igikomere cyo kurengana: yambara umwambaro wo kwikomeza cyane akigira umuntu utapfa kumeneramo akakwereka ko akomeye cyane.
5.igikomere cyo gusuzugurwa: yambara umwambaro wo kwiyoberanya akamera nkumuntu ushimishwa n’imibabaro akibwira ko imibabaro ntacyo itwaye akanayemera rwose.
